Sex Ki Pehli Raat - First Night of Sex

KAAMSUTRA KA OFFICIAL LICENSE!!!

EK SAHELI- Kya tumhe kuchh pata bhi hai ki MANGALSUTRA ka matlab aakhir kya hai?
DOOSRI SAHELI- Haan, kyon nahi pata hai. Yah mangalsutra KAAMSUTRA ka sukh aur SEX ka poora maja lene ka OFFICIAL LICENSE hai!!!

GARBH THAHAR GAYA!!!

PATNI PATI SE - Kuchh kahoon, tum maroge to nahi?
PATI- Nahi.
PATNI- Mujhe garbh rah gaya hai.
PATI- Are vaah!!! Ye to khushi ki baat hai. Tu dar kyon rahi thi?
PATNI- College ke dino me jab Papa se yahi baat bataya tha to badi maar lagi thi, isliye!!!

VIYAGRA KI PRESCRIBED DOSE!!!

Doctor dwara VIYAGRA ki bataai gai DOSE:
NEW GIRLFRIEND- Viyagra ki koi jaroorat nahi
OLD GIRLFRIEND- Aadhi Tablet
RAKHAIL- 1 Tablet
CALLGIRL- Choos kar ya Mooth maar kar khada kar degi
PATNI- 2 Tablet, Whisky, Bharpoor Will Power aur Usaki Ijaajat

SECRETARY SE NAAJAYAJ SAMBANDH!!!

PATNI - Lagta hai tumhara SECRETARY ke sath NAJAAYAJ SAMBANDH hai?
PATI- Ye tum kaise kah sakti ho?
PATNI- Daave se kah sakti hoon, kal jab Uska Pati aaya tha to vo tumhara UNDERWEAR pahne huye tha!!!

PADOSI DEKH LENGE!!!

PATNI PATI SE- Tum balcony me yoon NANGE kyon tahal rahe ho, sare padosi dekh lenge?
PATI- Main nange tahal raha hoon to kya hua? Tumhe jalan ho rahi hai kya?
PATNI- Jalan...my foot!!! Tumhare aur apne bhale ke liye kah rahi hoon, ve log yahi sochenge ki maine tumse sirf paise ke liye shadi ki hai.

TAARIKH PAR TAARIKH

Teen Saheliyan aapas me apne-apne SEX LIFE ke baare baat kar rahi thi:

EK SAHELI- Mera Engineer Pati bhi na bas...erect-erect...khada karo-khada karo...aur uthaao kahte rahta hai. Mano jaise uska L*nd nahi koi building ho.
DOOSRI SAHELI- Aur mera Doctor Pati jab bhi bistar pe aata hai to har samay inject karo-inject karo hi kahta rahta hai.
TEESRI SAHELI (thandi saans lete hue)- Tum sab kitni khushnaseeb ho, aur ek mera Judge Pati hai…bas taarikh par….taarikh hi deta rahta aur main Pyasi Rah Jati Hoon!!!

SEX KI PEHLI RAAT

SHADI KI PEHALI RAAT ME PATI khush hokar puchhata hai- Kya vaastav me, SEX karne ki ye tumhari pehali raat hai?
PATNI sharmaate hue- Nahi-nahi, vaastav me main raat me kisi se SEX pehali baar karavaa rahi hoon.

TOP-UP ME KAAM CHALA RAHI THI

Suhagaraat ko PATI apni PATNI se SEX karte hue puchhata hai- Kya mahsoos kar rahi ho, Jaaneman?
PATNI- Kya bataaun Dear!!! Yahi ki aaj tak main TOP-UP me hi apna kaam chalar rahi thi, aaj se life-Time karva liya hai.

CHHOTA CONDOM

TEACHER classroom me STUDENT se- Hame Machchharon ko paida hone se rokana chahiye.
EK STUDENT- Vo to ho nahi sakata, Sir?
TEACHER- Kyon ?
STUDENT- Kyonki Sir, itna Chhota Condom banaaya hi nahi ja sakta hai.

YE TO ABHI DOODH PEETA HAI!!!

BUS CONDUCTOR- Bachche ka bhi Ticket lena padega, Madam.
LADY PASSENGER- Iska bhi ticket lagega? Ye to abhi bhi mera Dhoodh peeta hai.
BUS CONDUCTOR- Oye Madam Jee!!! Doodh to iska baap bhi peeta hoga, to kya uska Ticket nahi lagega!!!